Rambling thoughts

So the end of the summer is here. I haven't done much.. There has been a lot of activity in my life. Moving into a new house. Not apartment. Wondering if I should marry or just float on by.

I think that it would be a bad move to marry I mean.. I don't think that I am the marring type. When I was a kid that seemed great. But the reality or a man and me.. Answering to him.. All that jazz doesn't do it for me.. I like not owing someone. I like my freedom to choose. I like the option to opt out.. I like not having to really truely answer to a man... Moving my son into a new school. Getting fatter. HUGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My art is getting better but my friends are starting to show thier ass. I hope that this year is a better year then last. My mother got breast cancer. I can't stand that woman. BUT she is my mother and mine to deal with.

I can't help but want to smash her head into a guard rail. I mean shit the sound of her voice annoys me.
.. Or don't want to deal with her. She is always the victim. ALWAYS... I hate those people..Stand up for your shit.. Take resonsibility for your fuck ups.. DAMN!.....Family always says they want to help.. Try to guilt you into it but in the end don't really.

I thought that I would be in a different place then this. I have written and painted more then I have in years ... however I am more intro verted and sadder then I have been in years not to mention all the weight gain... I am pushing the ole heave hooo... You can stick a string on my and put me in the Macy's Day float.

Once a friend of mine mention how I am plump but not to worry you can't really tell in my body it is just my face that is fat.. Well that was the pushing point. That is enough for now.. I will try again tomorrow. FUCKIN SHIT...................... Conio...